All posts filed under: Relationships

Agony Answers: Should I settle for less than true love?

Q: I am forty and never been married or had children. I have been seeing a man for six months who is lovely but I don’t feel the spark I have felt with previous partners. Should I settle and have the family I’ve always wanted knowing that I won’t be unhappy, but won’t be madly in love? A: This is such a dilemma and I really feel for you – and for the man you’ve met too. The fact that you’re even asking for advice rings warning bells – if you really loved this man, you wouldn’t be asking what I think, would you? Equally, if you were twenty, or even thirty, you would know the answer to your own question – you’d walk away. The problem here is that your biological clock isn’t just ticking; it’s ringing its alarm bell. But, of course, there is no guarantee that you could have children – with or without this man. Does he actually want children? Have you discussed the possibility? Then again, there’s the magic spark …

Biodynamic Therapy – rediscovering your ‘true self’

How many of us simply muddle through life as best we can? There’s the job that stifles us, the family who drive us mad, the relationships that grate. Over the years we’ve learned to grit our teeth and put a brave face on it. But while gritting your teeth gets you through the days it is, according to biodynamic therapists, slowly destroying your true self. The “brave face” is a mask that we initially put on as protection but which, over the years, becomes a form of armour, cutting us off from our true emotions and banishing any real sense of joy. Take away the mask and see through the eyes of your true self and the world will become a far brighter place: more vibrant, more intense, more alive. Biodynamic therapists say that as children we live only in our true self (which they call the primary personality) – spontaneous, exuberant, intuitive, really “alive”. But as we get older we gradually learn to hide our feelings from the world for fear of ridicule or …

How fit is your relationship? Take the Love MOT Quiz

If your relationship were a body would it be fit and toned, in the peak of health; or would it be fat and flabby, barely able to run for the bus? It’s relatively straightforward to find out how fit we are in our bodies, but it’s often not so simple to road-test our relationships. After all, even relationships which appear to be in tip-top condition often have an Achilles’ heel – be it communication hiccups or the commitment abyss.  Hence this –  the ultimate fitness regime for couples. Firstly a questionnaire which really puts your relationship through its paces – just like a gym assessment it is designed to highlight your strengths and uncover your weaknesses. Having found out which areas of your relationship are seriously out of condition, suggestions follow on how to bring your relationship back to peak performance. If it’s already running well, you’ll discover how to make it even better. After all, why settle for jogging along when you could be breezing the marathon? THE QUIZ If you join a gym …